All posts in June 2016

  • What Are We Busy About?

    “It is not enough to be busy,” said Henry David Thoreau. “So are the ants. The question is: What are we busy about?”

    We all know the feeling that says, “If I sit down, I’ll never get up!” All successful journeys are like that, whether the sitting down is literal or figurative. Remember civil rights activist Rosa Parks? She refused to surrender her bus seat to a white passenger, supporting the Montgomery boycott and other efforts to end segregation. In other words, she sat down to make a big difference.

    When situations occur, don’t think about all the work ahead. Just ask yourself, “What is my highest expression of Self, now?”

    And in terms of momentum?  Sir Isaac Newton’s first law of motion basically states that a body at rest tends to remain at rest, and a body in motion tends to remain in motion, unless acted on by an external force.

    This is also true of human activity.

    So if you want to reach your objective, keep moving. Otherwise, it could take a lot of work to pry you from that state of rest.

    Many Americans are so excessively busy you may question their need for this advice. Aren’t they always in motion? But what kind of motion is it?  I’m not talking about going through motions for their own sake. I’m talking about forward momentum.

    Some motions people go through in life are merely circular. These motions take them back to the same points every day: bed to kitchen to car to work to kitchen to couch to bed, and back. But leaders, while they might go through some of those motions, also take motions that create upward momentum. They learn a new skill, visit a new country, start a new project, create a new business, and then they keep moving to execute and implement those new things.

    Leadership is not about robotic motion, rather it is about inspired movement toward goodness.

    Some people step outside the circular dance, now and then, simply to laugh, love, and play. That’s life-giving momentum, too.

    Whatever you’re busy doing, ask yourself: Am I moving forward in a meaningful way toward my authentic Self-expression?  If the answer is yes, then keep moving in that direction, at the pace that suits your heart and mind.

    Velocity has a grace and flow that can create a joyful atmosphere. Do you remember the last time you worked on a project that had that kind of momentum? The very air around everyone involved felt electrified, didn’t it?  As a leader, that’s the environment you want to deliberately and consciously create. You don’t just wait for it to happen.

    At times I’ve had to reach into my gut for the courage to take the next step. I have felt resistance in the strangest ways, whether I am attending a meeting, speaking my truth, or presenting to a large group. This resistance is good, if we will use it for our depth and growth as a Soul Centered Leader. Many times, when I have stepped through the greatest obstacles, I have experienced the largest result or upside.

    That next step is where the maturity of leadership prevails. You will grow as you keep stepping past the limitations you perceive yourself to have. That’s why many leaders become spiritually more mature as they get older: not because their body or brain is at its peak, but because they step through their challenges, fear and resistance and build a muscle of leadership that demonstrates wisdom and strength.

    We can make life easier by only focusing on the next ordinary step. Everything worthwhile in life offers the opportunity to discover grace in each and every step. If you need a reason to take the next step, envision your reward: the extraordinary achievement of true self-satisfaction and service to others.  We are not talking about mindless action herein, rather we are talking about the balance and wisdom of true leadership.  At times, the discipline is in slowing down, listening and paying attention to what is most necessary.

    Trust your Self, listen, act and lead.

    Blessings,

    Stephen Paul

  • How to use an early life lesson for your greater good.

    A Lesson That Changed My Life

    When the teacher called my name, I just sat there, stunned. I couldn’t believe it: I was the winner of a national writing contest! It was all the more unexpected because I didn’t even know my work had been entered in the contest.

    Back then, I found writing easy and natural. When I’d written my essay, I was completely detached from thoughts of competition or winning, because I didn’t remember the teacher even mentioning a contest. I just did what I was asked to do, which was to write about the future of the world. To me the assignment was purely fun and creative. I was in the third grade.

    Winning that contest felt like an amazing accomplishment for me—until it was taken away.

    That moment came when the school principal called me into his office. I had no idea why he wanted to see me. When he asked if I had cheated on the contest, I was dumbfounded. I’d written the story on my own, without outside help or copying. But he kept questioning me, making it clear that he didn’t believe me. I asked him why he thought I was a “liar.” He replied that the words I used in my story were beyond a third grade vocabulary level, words like “decade,” for example.

    Instead of congratulating a student who had excelled beyond expectations, the principal seemed more inclined to prove that such excellence wasn’t possible.
    I was too young to know how to defend myself. I was guilty until proven innocent, and he acted so certain that I gave up.

    What could an eight-year-old boy do in the face of adult authority?

    As I walked out of his office carrying my Big Chief notepad, I felt sick inside. I felt tainted. From that moment on, I equated writing with pain. I didn’t think it was worth the effort to do well at something, if it would only lead to unfair accusations. I did as little writing as possible for more than 30 years.

    Has there been a “writing contest” story in your life, a moment along the way when you got the message to shut down an expression of yourself?

    It’s hard to blame that eight-year-old boy for shutting down. It also seems pointless to blame the principal, just another human prone to mistakes.

    But what about the grown man, who, based on a mistake someone else made when he was eight, decided to give up on his gift and hide it from the world?
    As a leader, I find it wastes time to place blame or play victim.

    I’d rather ask these questions: 1) How can I share my gifts? And, 2) What steps can I take to let go of the past and begin expressing myself again?
    Like you, I have something unique to offer…something that only I can offer. We all have something unique to offer. But are we courageous enough to let go of the villains and victims of our past and see ourselves as we truly are, and see our gifts for what they can be?

    Children are always learning, and when we grow up, we don’t have to stop. The lesson here is one of awareness. My choice of what to do with that moment in the principal’s office was available then, and it still remains. I can use that moment as an excuse to shrink from obstacles: injustice, fear of authority, and a belief that effort is rarely rewarded. Or, I can use it as an opportunity to grow into my strengths: a sense of justice, an instinct to stand up for myself, and a gift so exceptional that someone had trouble believing it.

    It’s not all that important for us to understand why we chose to shut down along the way. Only that we have.

    In my leadership work, I often say, “Understanding is the booby prize.” It no longer matters what choice you made then. What matters is the choice you make now.

    Now is all any of us has. Leadership is presence in action. Good leaders don’t waste time blaming themselves or others for their lot in life. They assess what they have to offer now, and create from there.
    If you can see your way to that, your next question will be, “What should I create?”

    How about whatever is in front of you?
    If you were being exactly the person you always wanted to be, what would be the next powerful thing to do?
    Why not do that?

    I’ve long since reframed my picture of that moment in the principal’s office, so that now I see it as a gift. Every day, that long-ago principal tests my resolve to write and the little boy I once was gives meaning to my words. When I write, I think of him.

    The people and moments that challenge us can be our best teachers, if we let them be. These experiences can give us the tools to shape our purpose and to develop our Leadership.  Further, each of these events are simply learning steps in the direction of mastery. When I look back on the path of my life, I see only progress; not perfection but progression. IMG_2830

    Blessings,

    Stephen Paul